NJ ~ sigh

As I left work last Friday, telling my boss that I was going “home”, I smiled. She didn’t realize that I was NOT from this ridiculous place that I currently “reside”. Apparently, on my way to the Garden State I drive through the town she grew up in (which is also the THORN in my side ironically… she told me what exit on 84 she grew up in.. that happens to be the very one that when I get sick of CT and driving, I look up and I’m always, without fail, at that exit). We had a little conversation about “my part” of NJ and she just said “that area is really beautiful; I kind of wish more people would realize that”. I liked her even more that day.

Words I use to describe NJ: green, rolling, farmland, highway, trees, deer, shore-Pt. Pleasant variety. Words others use which make me feel all stabby (thank you Jen Lancaster, heart): fist pumping, turnpike, factories, smell, shore-Sleazside variety.

 

Anyway I managed to drive all of the way there, without hitting ANY traffic. Of course, the minute I arrived it was busy busy busy, but toooooooooooootally worth it. Visiting my grandparents, the family, the friends (woot Vittoria! Ps- send her good thoughts for waking up early and making it to week 2 ;-), even the sisters were decent. Thank you all.

 

The main event was the 4th of July carnival and fireworks. This is my annual NJ event and one I really will only miss for VERY important family events. I actually have no idea why we go, since Vittoria and I spend the entire time looking out for and then avoiding everyone we went to high school with. It’s quite a wonderful tradition actually…. But also quite seriously a waste of our time :-)

 

Here is my list of things that make NJ awesome… my list of un-awesome things is pretty short (deer, cops, HS people, maybe more I can’t remember):

• Bagels!
• NY Style Delis that make huge matzoh balls and have pickle bars
• Mandee
• ALWAYS being near a highway
• Cheap gas
• Free assistant pumping cheap gas
• DINERS (mmmm disco fries)
• Disco fries.. I just decided they need their own line

 I’ll think of more and make many more posts on the topic. Trust.

 

PS- watch ROYAL PAINS tonight on USA. I have no vested interest; it is just an amazingly awesome show. Enjoy, and you’re welcome. (Best enjoyed with pretzel M&MS ;-)

Oh, hello there: No Sorries

I just realized its been nearly 2 full weeks since my last post.  I also just realized that if I continue to "apologize"(and not really mean it of course) for not posting regularly, its going to get old.  But really, if Vittoria is back and better than ever, I'm going to have to start to get religious about this.  Although not really, but all of the sudden I felt very passionate about that.

Ok LOTS to say.

Here's what I've been up to... in case you care.

1.  Zyrtec is GOOD.  Worst allergy season ever, eh?  I was the cheerleader at cheer camp in high school who was approached by the camp leaders to question me about doing drugs.  I had barely had my growth spurt yet at about 5'2 and was still wearing Limited Too clothes. In HS, and they thought I was on drugs.  Why? Oh, my eyes were bloodshot, swollen and I was pretty loopy.  Right, we were also in the cornfields of Pennsylvania=hello allergens.  I have been pretty shocked for about 2 months as to why I've only coughed once or twice, why I'm able to wear contacts and why I am not attached to a tissue box.  Then my throat and ear tubes became "dysfunctional" (ask my dr. she used that exact term). Apparently THAT is how I'm affected by the worst allergy season ever. Lovely.

2. VITTORIA IS BACK. And I missed her.  Oh, you missed her too? Well I'm one of her "real life friends(jealz?!)", so multiply your missage by a couple and thats me. Yay for seeing her in a week and a half though.

3.  Jen Lancaster's 5th book came out.  I finally started reading it this week.   Start with "Bitter is the new black" and go from there.  You can borrow mine.  Everyone should be reading her work.  I carried "My Fair Lazy" around the office one day and introduced 2 new people to the world that is Jennsylvania.  Honestly? She uses "stabby" as a descriptive feeling.  As in, "she's making me feel all stabby". Heart.

4. Was at that specialty-ish grocery store again.  Picked up 2 crabs.  THIS time (of course, because now I know) fish counter man says "would you like me to 'clean' them for you?"... (after the conversation I just had with bf about if he would do my dirty work again and he was a little bit psyched to do it).  I ran and checked with him and he looked sad, so I asked fish counter man to leave them as is and I will take them home.  We get home and...? crabs are dead. Legit.  I actually called the store to make sure they were still safe to eat.  I'm not one with food.

5.  ITS FRESH FRUIT SEASON!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  I am so excited to, it better be soon, have a free weekend day to go strawberry picking.  Its one of the only fruits that I love but have yet to pick my own. (of the varieties, that you know, you actually can at a pyo place)

6.  Any good little Jews out there?  I thought I was going crazy when, last summer, the Black Eyed Peas released "I Got A Feeling" (Is that its name?) and I kept hearing a Hebrew word in the background.  NO, not "Mazel Tov", I'm no moron.. everyone with hearing capacity knows those words are in that song, thanks.  I kept hearing "L'Chaim".  If you don't, listen again.  Its at the chorus part where they say a word loudly and then it sounds like a techno beat is echoing.  They say "MAZEL TOV!" then, in a techno beat "L'Chaim".  I only recently, (its been out how long?) actually Googled the lyrics, and I'm right. Thanks songwriters, you make me smile.

7. I came home from work the other day, sent bf a gchat message saying "are you coming home". 36 minutes later, the following comes through on gchat.  Definitely "Shiz my boyfriend says" (courtesy of LiLu, yes I read your blog ;-) material.  Totally reminds me of "monkey monkey underpants", which is still one of the greatest TV lines, to me at least).
6:20 PM BF: I'm walking
On the street
6:21 PM What are you doing
Are you even there
I'm thirsty
Dooooo doooo
6:22 PM Walking
6:23 PM I spy with my little eye...something blue
Walking
Ooo I smell grilling
I see the smoke now
6:24 PM I'm hungry
A dog!
Crossing the street
I like the shade
Lexus
6:25 PM I stepped in something sticky
The sun is bright
Shade
Bright
Shade
Bright
6:26 PM Shade
I don't appreciate the color of thay house
A dog!
6:27 PM What's the point of plastic swans
A dog!
6:28 PM Police car, act natural
Crossing the street
Crows are talking to each other
I have an itch
This grass is really a lovely green
6:29 PM They must use chemicals
An orange car. Hm.
6:30 PM Baby crying
I see the house
There's your car, so you are home just not listening to me
Stupid flower touched me
6:31 PM Are you going to open the door?
Knocking
Hi

8. If I posted more, these wouldn't be so long. I'll think about it.

"How do you like 'dem apples!" Or: Questions Of The Day

1. Why do people swerve left to go right, and vice versa? Followup- why do some people find it necessary to come to a complete stop before turning right?

2. When I clicked on CNN.com this morning and saw this "latest news" headline, "Remains of 2 people found in trash bags", why did I automatically assume it happened in NJ? Followup- How was I even right?

3. Is MSG in everything that is of an Asian food variety? Followup- What makes me crave CPK's miso salad ALL the time?

4. Why is Jen Lancaster's "My Fair Lazy" not coming out until May? Followup- Who else should I be reading? (I seem to like memoir genre)

5. Is it going to get cold again before summer? Followup- Please say no.

6. Why do our palates change as we get older? Followup- Anyone else think banana peppers makes their veggie sandwich taste like vomit?

7. Who else misses their "old life"? Followup- Why aren't YOU cheering for UConn?

8. Is no one else concerned that there seems to be a major earthquake reported every 4-6 days for the last 1.5 months? Followup- Isn't it amazing that mining is still such a large industry, and that there is still no real way to prevent such accidents that happened yesterday?

9. If someone asks how you are, and without complaining about one thing you update them on how you're doing- why do they feel compelled to offer advice? Followup- Why can't it ever be good, relevant advice?

10. Do you know the muffin man? Followup- I "researched" Passover and decided it is only 7 days this year. Take that boils!